tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12550587.post3261366601145158055..comments2023-11-05T07:35:30.331+00:00Comments on Dead Interesting: They're not doing it his wayMargaret Nelsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01493624466366591603noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12550587.post-34819510719642570512009-10-21T20:55:28.646+01:002009-10-21T20:55:28.646+01:00Much as there may have been to knock in Father Ed’...Much as there may have been to knock in Father Ed’s blog post, I speak as someone of no faith who thinks it’s important to be faithful to facts—because it’s important to be fair, and because proper, productive debate depends on that. In important ways this blundering prelate has been mis-reported.<br /><br />Tana Wollen, Head of Ceremonies at the BHA, says: “What a shame that this particular priest seems more concerned with his own feelings than allowing bereaved people a ceremony that reflects their beliefs and wishes and those of the loved ones they have lost.” This is incorrect. Father Ed is pro-choice. What he actually says is: “Naturally there will be those who disagree with my beliefs; I think they should have the right to exercise this choice even though I believe them to be misguided.”<br /><br />You don’t have to be a religionist to sympathise with any priest who, charged with conducting a funeral according to the rites of his or her sect, watches their words fall on empty or hostile eyes. To feel like a lemon under those circs is only human. Why do so many unbelievers ask for religious funerals? Yes, that is the question. And as Father Ed justifiably asks, “if this is your position, why invite me to the party? ... If there is no desire for this Christian dimension then why have the priest?”<br /><br />It’s Father Ed’s beef that “Christian prayers of ‘commendation and committal’ are not mere aesthetic choices in a market place of funeral options.” In other words, he doesn’t like his church being used merely as a nice funeral venue that knows how to put on a nice show. Who can argue with that? <br /><br />Yes, yes, his Church (if not his church) is happy enough to indulge those who wish to use its photogenic buildings and genial rites for nice weddings. There is nothing straightforward in this.<br /><br />We can all learn from each other. Father Ed says “I was actually seeking to raise a question which is important for all society – what are funerals for?” <br /><br />It’s a good question, and anyone who thinks they have the answer has stopped thinking.Charles Cowlinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06757185376546920527noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12550587.post-3626564322587478242009-10-21T11:26:04.320+01:002009-10-21T11:26:04.320+01:00Excellent post!Excellent post!Mariahttp://www.thinkhumanism.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12550587.post-4893626277780021302009-10-20T18:59:24.461+01:002009-10-20T18:59:24.461+01:00Dear Margaret, having attended many family funeral...Dear Margaret, having attended many family funerals the saddest has to have been that of my Uncle Bert (a lifelong communist and labour activist and devout evangelist atheist)the Vicar spoke about this man as though the 'Church' had 'got' him at last, this was of no comfort to the Christian members of the family and the whole service seemed frankly bizarre to his comrades and art group friends, then again the anger generated some fine and heated discussions and memories at the celebration we had afterwards! Thank you again for your blog it really is thought provoking. TimHarpSkunknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12550587.post-28579601479980689232009-10-20T17:59:36.175+01:002009-10-20T17:59:36.175+01:00Father Ed's blog's in The Times today.
I ...Father Ed's blog's in <a href="http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/comment/faith/article6881679.ece" rel="nofollow">The Times today</a>.<br /><br />I was just wondering if the anonymous ageist troll who wrote several nasty comments (unpublished) was one of Father Ed's parishioners? If so, s/he's setting a fine example of Christian charity.Margaret Nelsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01493624466366591603noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12550587.post-21309783582581312522009-10-20T14:46:25.472+01:002009-10-20T14:46:25.472+01:00@ 'Anonymous'
I beg to differ. I think it...@ 'Anonymous'<br />I beg to differ. I think it is unstable, semiliterate, narrow-minded types that resort to gratuitous swearing that should be banned from the internet.quedulahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09737971867539674984noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12550587.post-55632991018202506732009-10-20T13:47:05.613+01:002009-10-20T13:47:05.613+01:00Dear Anonymous, If you're going to abuse and i...Dear Anonymous, If you're going to abuse and insult me, at least have the guts to do it in your own name (and learn to spell and punctuate). You're right that I won't publish your comment, but thanks for making me laugh with "Your piece here looks like its written by a moron trying to get attention how very sad for a women of your ripe old age."Margaret Nelsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01493624466366591603noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12550587.post-3225760205125239022009-10-20T13:34:01.450+01:002009-10-20T13:34:01.450+01:00Thanks Mary, and thanks for your open letter, whic...Thanks Mary, and thanks for your open letter, which I've posted on Twitter and Facebook. Especially liked the bit about cures - if only!Margaret Nelsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01493624466366591603noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12550587.post-69098573956913473502009-10-20T12:49:42.633+01:002009-10-20T12:49:42.633+01:00Couldn't agree more. Having attended both reli...Couldn't agree more. Having attended both religious and humanist ceremonies (weddings and funerals) I've noted that the humanist events are more relevant to the individuals involved and feel far more personal.<br />It just saddens me that my own wedding happened some time before I was aware of the possibility of a humanist ceremony. At least my funeral can be arranged in a way which will "work" for me.garholhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08566901818396697782noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12550587.post-18245996705862754052009-10-20T12:08:17.262+01:002009-10-20T12:08:17.262+01:00Well written post.
I'm sure that for someone ...Well written post.<br /><br />I'm sure that for someone who is religious, a requiem mass or other devotional ceremony in a church is a wonderful and spiritually uplifting experience.<br /><br />But religious rituals are only meaningful if one subscribes to the religion in question.<br /><br />For someone who isn't religious, a church ceremony is the experience of sitting on a hard bench in a massive, draughty room, while someone up at the front drones a load of repetitive and unoriginal phrases that they have said so often that they have become devoid of any real passion or meaning.<br /><br />I don't know what kind of funeral I'd like - it seems a bit redundant as I won't be in a position to enjoy or object to the content - but I'd definitely prefer it to be more about celebrating my life and comforting my loved ones, than about flattering a priest and making him feel needed.Maryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11639094548415759560noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12550587.post-88160124147184297162009-10-20T01:14:47.634+01:002009-10-20T01:14:47.634+01:00Thank you Meg. I love you too.Thank you Meg. I love you too.Margaret Nelsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01493624466366591603noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12550587.post-38932784055141773482009-10-19T20:54:51.967+01:002009-10-19T20:54:51.967+01:00Many men of the cloth sport enormous egos. It'...Many men of the cloth sport enormous egos. It's a shame that despite their religious calling, they've learned nothing of true humility. As a child I listened to priest after priest preach sermons brimming with arrogance. Their message - whatever it was - was drowned by their bombast. By the time I was 13 I was convinced that religion had become nothing more than the politics of god. <br /><br />When I die, the music at my funeral will be joyful and moving and loud. If anything resembling a dirge is played, I shall climb out of my coffin and give them what-for.<br /><br />I love this and all your other blogs, Margaret. You are a wonder.Megatonlovehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17671546333302119579noreply@blogger.com